Oooh That Smell …

When I was younger, I loved the song “That Smell” by Lynyrd Skynyrd. I still do. I used to crank it up and sing along, not fully understanding what the song was really about. As a kid, I had no idea. As I got older, I quickly learned.

Now, as an ostomate, that song hits a little differently.

Every time I change my ostomy bag, that chorus pops into my head like an earworm. And honestly? It makes me laugh. At first, the smell caught me completely off guard. I remember thinking, “What in the world did I eat last night?” It felt horrible, embarrassing, and a little shocking because I had never experienced anything quite like it.

Now, I just smile and sing a little bit of “That Smell” in my head.

As ostomates, we have a lot to take in — pun absolutely intended. One of those things is learning how the foods we eat affect our bodies, our output, gas, and yes, odor. Food becomes part of the learning curve. Sometimes it is trial and error. Sometimes it is trial and “well, I won’t be doing that again.”

I asked ChatGPT to give me a list of foods that ostomates may be able to eat with fewer smelly side effects. Here is the part that stood out to me:

“There is no food that guarantees no smell or no gas, but some foods are usually gentler for many ostomates. The best approach is to test foods one at a time and keep a small food/output journal, because triggers vary from person to person.”

That makes sense. We are all different. What works for one ostomate may not work for another. Our bodies have their own opinions, and sometimes they are loud about it.

I also noticed some medical resources call farts “wind,” which made me laugh. I may start saying, “Excuse me, I am experiencing wind.” Sounds classier, doesn’t it?

Anyway, here is a list of foods that may be easier on the pouch.

Usually Lower-Gas, Lower-Odor Foods

Proteins

• Chicken
• Turkey
• Lean pork
• Lean beef
• Tofu, if tolerated
• Smooth peanut butter in small amounts

Carbohydrates

• White rice
• Pasta
• Potatoes without skin
• White or sourdough bread
• Plain crackers
• Oatmeal, if it does not thicken output too much

Fruits

• Bananas
• Applesauce
• Canned peaches or pears
• Peeled apples
• Melon, if tolerated

Vegetables

• Carrots
• Green beans
• Zucchini without skin
• Squash
• Peeled cucumber
• Well-cooked vegetables, which are often easier than raw vegetables

Dairy

• Yogurt may help reduce odor for some people
• Lactose-free milk or low-fat dairy may be easier if regular milk causes gas

Foods That May Help Reduce Odor

Some ostomates find these helpful:

• Yogurt with live cultures
• Parsley
• Buttermilk or kefir, if tolerated
• Cranberry juice, for some people
• Plenty of water

Foods More Likely to Cause Gas or Odor

These are common culprits, though not everyone reacts the same way:

• Beans
• Lentils
• Cabbage
• Broccoli
• Cauliflower
• Brussels sprouts
• Onions
• Eggs
• Fish
• Asparagus
• Garlic
• Carbonated drinks
• Beer
• Chewing gum, because it makes you swallow air

Now, before StomaDad, before cancer, before the bag, I spent about five years as a professional chef. I loved it. I loved the creativity, the challenge, and the way food could bring people together.

At one point, I was challenged to cook vegan food. This was before being vegan was as common as it is today. It was a real challenge. A lot of the ingredients I normally used were taken out of my creative toolbox. I even had to use a specific set of pans that had not been used with meat products.

Remember, this was before the internet made everything searchable in five seconds. I had to figure it out the old-fashioned way. After a few weeks, I got the hang of it. I learned how to adjust, rethink, and still make food that tasted good.

In some ways, I feel like I am back in that same kitchen today.

What do I eat now? Do I give up the foods I love from the “bad” column? Do I modify them? Do I eat smaller portions and see what happens? Or do I just accept the consequences and sing “That Smell” on repeat?

I do not think ostomy life has to mean giving up everything we enjoy. I think it means learning how to work with our bodies instead of fighting them. Maybe that means changing how we prepare certain foods. Maybe it means eating smaller amounts. Maybe it means saving certain foods for days when we are staying close to home.

And maybe, once in a while, it means eating the beans and accepting the concert that follows.

I would love to hear from you.

What foods work well for you? What foods have you learned to avoid? Do you have recipes that are pouch-friendly, lower odor, or easier on digestion?

Send your ideas, tips, and recipes to:

Maybe it is time to pull out that old Lynyrd Skynyrd album again.

Until then, be kind to yourself — and maybe keep a little pouch deodorizer nearby.

Be Kind to Yourself.